I'm Dying Here

R. Doubting Thomas Perdue, tough Aussie former P.I. and jailbird, is in trouble, and it can only get worse. Tom's *Feng shui* consultancy implodes when some bastard drives a Mack truck through his heritage office. Fatal things keep happening to his phones. And who's been blabbing about his racehorse-doping past? The love of his life has made a ten-year vow of celibacy to the Virgin Mary. Tom's Goth daughter's girlfriend's obese sister has vanished, extremely foul play suspected. Meanwhile, an unusual racing camel named Nile Fever has become an animal of interest to the Australian Federal Police, and Tom is up to his neck in the middle of the mess. I'm Dying Here is a darkly comic crime caper that leaves no taboo, or cell phone, unviolated. "This is a comic, crazy, original crime novel. You won't find another one like it this year, or, more likely, ever." Bill Crider. "What it reminds me of, powerfully, is a Donald Westlake comic novel about Dormunder. If you did smart, funny caper novels, I suspect you'll like this one as much as I do." Todd Mason. "Think anything Joseph Wambaugh, and then make it much more funny, and you start to get an idea of how much fun this is to read." Amazon five-star review.