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"A darkly comic, grotesquely immersive grimdark fantasy about a foul-mouthed dwarf bounty hunter and the witch who survives him."
Seagrum is a dwarf who gets things done. When the Magister of the Hue and Cry recruits him to solve a little problem that he has with vampires, it seems pretty obvious that he is going to get it sorted. The only question that there should be is how long he will take to do it and how long would it take Florencetown to get back to normal. That is how the thing should have gone but it did not.Perhaps it was the fault of the dwarf's irascible temper or his infatuation with a beautiful former witch who has been drawn into the vampires' scheme. It could be the interference of the Magister's tame and invariably hungry werewolves who are opportunistic feeders, perpetually looking out for a free lunch. Maybe it is the simple fact that the Magister has his own issues in the form of a beautiful woman with a penchant for stilettos, leather and a whip who seems to appear whenever he rings a curious little bell that sits unobtrusively on his desk.
Of course, the fact that no one actually understands exactly what a vampire's death pledge is doesn't really help. Although we might refer to them as mortgages, no human ever takes more than one death pledge in the world of Seagrum the Dwarf: it just isn't possible given that humans only have one life (and death). Vampires, naturally enough and despite the many edicts of the Hue and Cry, simply don't tell: preferring to keep their dealings shrouded in mystery. Then there is the matter of payment. Seagrum is extortionately expensive: more than the Hue and Cry can afford in fact.
That is where Jonas the Strangler comes in.
This book has the potential to appeal strongly to readers of:
Joe Abercrombie (The First Law)
Glen Cook (The Black Company)
Terry Pratchett's darker Discworld corners
Scott Lynch (Gentleman Bastards), but dirtier
Neil Gaiman's Neverwhere.
David is a father, writer, streamer.
With the support of his partner and children, David has been creating stories daily since late 2021. He loves exploring writing topics on his Twitch stream. Outside of writing, he plays a semi-aggressive game of Magic, enjoys relaxing with Dwarf Fortress and Stardew Valley, and reads each night to his partner, Kelly. He dreams of the ocean, and looks forward to living near it someday.
David has released two collections of short stories: Anthropods (July, 2025) and Breakfast & Other Journeys We Take (Nov, 2024). Additionally, "Wraith and Specter" appeared in Future's Lens (Jan 2023) and "Escape and Transform" appeared in Reality's Lens (May 2023). "Tapping at the Door" appeared in Adventures Issue 8 (Sept 2023). "Invasive Species" appeared in Warped Lens (Sept 2023).
David loves to inspire others to write, and encourages positivity and celebrates all wins, regardless of size.
Links:
telinartho.wordpress.com
Twitch.tv/telinartho
Mas.to/@telinartho
Bsky.app/profile/telinartho.bsky.social
Facebook.com/TelinArtho
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