Guys Read: Artemis Begins

Meet the real-life brother who inspired Artemis Fowl—and his wildest scheme to save his family from DEFCON four.

Long before Artemis Fowl appeared in Eoin Colfer’s hit series, he was born in the form of Eoin’s younger brother Donal--the “young criminal mastermind” of the family. And on one particular spring day, he concocts his most sinister plot yet.

In a house with five boys, dodging trouble requires the cunning of a seasoned operative. Donal has long been the neighborhood fixer, trading brilliant alibis and con jobs for bags of gummi bears.

When little brother Niall accidentally smashes their mother’s All-Ireland Best Actress crystal plate during solo table hockey, panic strikes. With Mum due inside in mere moments, Donal accepts his riskiest assignment yet.

A short story from the acclaimed collection Guys Read: Funny Business, edited by Jon Scieszka.

• Sibling Dynamics: Five brothers packed into a small house assign themselves boy-band roles, from reliable older brother Paul to the bespectacled resident writer taking notes.
• Funny Books for Kids: Laugh-out-loud family mayhem unfolds as the boys repurpose an engraved crystal trophy as a pastry roller.
• Unlikely Hero: Donal runs a backyard fixer enterprise, pausing his burial of a neighbor’s action figure to negotiate outrageous rescue schemes.
• Also by This Author: Imaginary Fred.