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After talking to the alleged asshole, does the “target” feel oppressed, humiliated, de-energized, or belittled by the person? In particular, does the target feel worse about him or herself?
Reviving Old Scratch
Richard Beck
Likewise, we do not “recognize” or “detect” emotions in others. These terms imply that an emotion category has a fingerprint that exists in nature, independent of any perceiver, waiting to be found. Any scientific question about “detecting” emotion automatically presumes a certain kind of answer. In the construction mindset, I speak of perceiving an instance of emotion.
How Emotions Are Made
Lisa Feldman Barrett
Self-discipline refers to achieving desirable behavior. Self-control refers to avoiding undesirable behavior.
Triggers
Marshall Goldsmith, Mark Reiter
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