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The client always knows more than you do about what to do next. —MARCIA REYNOLDS
Coach the Person, Not the Problem
Marcia Reynolds
SIMPLE TRUTH #7 When people are off track, don’t reprimand them—redirect them.
Simple Truths of Leadership
Ken Blanchard and Randy Conley
I’d never felt so free. This is where I want to be. I can fully be here and do what I’m doing, and see how far I can expand being here. I don’t have to try getting “there” anymore. I am here. I love where I’m at. I’m in the GAIN. I know I can keep creating GAINS. When you’re in the GAP, you’re desperate to get “there,” because you’re trying to escape being here. You’re bouncing around, rather than getting real and getting traction. When you’re in the GAP, you aren’t thinking long-term. You’re impulsively trying to fill an unresolved “need.” Conversely, when you’re in the GAIN, you no longer need to be “there.” This doesn’t mean you don’t have huge goals. It simply means you’re fully “here.” You’re where you want to be. You’re playing a long game, which means you LOVE where you’re at now, and you love where you’re going. You’re here. You don’t need to get “there.” You’re here. Be here. By playing the long game, you set your own course. You stop worrying about what other people think about you. You stop seeking other people’s approval of how you’re living your life. You stop trying to measure up to other people’s standards of success. Instead, you decide what success means to you, and you choose the life you’ll live. You realize that you’re living that life now. You’re free to live whatever life you want. The GAIN creates freedom. The GAP makes you a slave to your unhealthy need. The GAP makes you a slave to “there” and makes “here” a prison you’re trying to escape from. Alright, it’s time for another quick exercise. Pull out your journal and answer the following questions: Are there any areas in your life where you have obsessive passion? If so, what unresolved internal need are you trying to fill? What about your life and work do you love? What is your long game? When you’re playing the long game, you’re doing what you love. You’re not doing something just to get somewhere else. Do you have a long enough time table to truly slow down and enjoy being here, or are you trying to quickly get “there”? Look at your life right now—what are all the GAINS you can think of? How would your priorities change if you were playing the long game? FREEDOM “FROM” VS. FREEDOM “TO” “Freedom is now or never.” —Jiddu Krishnamurti In the classic book Escape from Freedom,26 Erich Fromm defines two types of freedom: Freedom from (which is external) Freedom to (which is internal)…
The Gap and the Gain
Benjamin Hardy and Dan Sullivan
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