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Sure, you might feel as if your awareness of the incentive is what led you to strengthen your grip. But what this experiment suggests is that maybe this is an illusion. That’s not the only possible interpretation, but it’s a salient one, and it’s one the Buddha would probably warm to: you think you’re directing the movie, but you’re actually just watching it. Or, at the risk of turning this into a metaphor that’s impossible to wrap your mind around, the movie is directing you—unless you manage to liberate yourself from it.
Why Buddhism Is True
Robert Wright
Remember, part of what let me see the truth about that refrigerator hum, and about my email correspondent, is that my mind was calm—not in the grips of anxiety or rage or any other major source of dukkha. Maybe the best way to put it is that enlightenment and liberation are mutually reinforcing: the more you do the things that bring liberation from suffering, the more clearly you see; and the more clearly you see, the easier it is to do the things that bring liberation from suffering. Which allows even more clarity of vision. And so on.
Why Buddhism Is True
Robert Wright
There are times when simply asking a question is the thing to do. And there are other times when sharing your answer to that same question can increase its impact. “What do you want?” is an extraordinarily strong question. Its power is amplified when you not only ask the question of the person you’re working with but also answer the question for yourself. It takes us back to Peter Block’s point, mentioned at the start of the chapter, about the nature of adult-to-adult conversations. When we each understand what the other wants, we’re in the middle of an interesting and worthwhile conversation. And part of the reason for that is the neuroscience of engagement.
The Coaching Habit
Michael Bungay Stanier
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