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We weren’t at all surprised to find that those students who spent most of their time trying to be good were more likely to experience depression than those who were more focused on getting better. Nor was it surprising that the worse the be-gooders felt, the less likely they were to do something useful about it. Feeling bad made them less likely to try to take any action to try to solve the problem. Feeling bad also made them less likely to function well in other aspects of their lives—their dishes lingered in the sink, their dirty laundry piled up, and their textbooks gathered dust.
Succeed
Heidi Grant Halvorson Ph.D. and Carol S. Dweck
My second-favorite question to ask a world-class professional musician is, “Have you ever been stuck in your practice?” I like asking the question because the typical answer is something like, “Every single day.” Good practice is all about working on something you can’t do, so it’s natural to feel stuck. Embrace that struggle, because that’s what good practice is. Practice is often fun, but it’s not supposed to be easy. Don’t label something you can’t play as “difficult,” though. When you label something you can’t play as difficult, that label sticks, even after you’ve mastered it. Instead, think of challenging music not as difficult, but simply as unfamiliar. Good practice is all about embracing the challenge of making the unfamiliar, familiar.
The Practice of Practice
Jonathan Harnum
A better strategy for shifting others’ expectations about your work is to consistently deliver what you promise instead of consistently explaining how you’re working. Become known as someone who never drops the ball, not someone who thinks a lot about their own productivity. If a request comes your way, be it in an email or hallway chat, make sure it’s handled. Don’t let things fall through the cracks, and if you commit to doing something by a certain time, hit the deadline, or explain why you need to shift it. If people trust you to handle the work they send your way, then they’re generally fine with not hearing back from you right away. On the other hand, if you’re flaky, others will demand faster responses, as they’ll feel they have to stay on you to ensure things get done. The professor and business writer Adam Grant uses the phrase “idiosyncrasy credits” to describe this reality.25 The better you are at what you do, he explains, the more freedom you earn to be idiosyncratic in how you deliver—no explanation required.
A World Without Email
Cal Newport
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